Assistant Directed – Number 24

I’ve avoided most jobs that had titles. I’ve been a babysitter, nanny, baby-store employee/manager, baby-store owner, and there was that failed attempt as a clerk at Fanny Mae candy. A lot of those jobs were me as the boss so to speak. I struggle with authority. I struggle with behaving like a normal person. I struggle with expectations put on me. I panic and I get raging diarrhea and I want to quit. So offering to Assistant Direct with my name on the program shines a light on me that I am not comfortable with. It places expectations on me and I’m getting paid so I have to deliver. When I volunteer people are happy with whatever scraps I will throw at them. If they are paying me, they want me to function…like a person. I did it. 

And it was scary. But I wrote out the expectations (I did actually google what an assistant director does and made a list because that’s how I roll) and I showed Rob and said, “I can do this list.” And I did do the list and I loved it! And I didn’t fall apart and I didn’t drown in the expectations and I didn’t make Rob do all the work. I did a thing and saw it all the way through and got paid and enjoyed it. It was a Christmas miracle. Sometimes bravery is believing you can. 

If you enjoyed this chapter and want to dig deeper into each story, my husband Rob and I do an exclusive companion podcast on my Patreon page.  We give further background into the story and include the spouse’s perspective.  Each one of these episodes averages 45 minutes to an hour. 
I also share different content across my social media channels and at my blog on the website.  
Podcast: Broken to Brave on Libsyn
Facebook: @BrokentoBravePodcast
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